If inhaling 409 causes lung cancer, I'm screwed.

Right now I'm trying to work out some kind of deal because my place was such a complete sty when I moved in. I spoke to Larry about it, and it turns out that the realty company is just MANAGING the property I'm renting. All decisions still need to go through the old landlord. What the hell, people.

Though it's starting to look like someone who actually gives a damn lives here, I thought I'd post some pictures of things before they were cleaned/as they were being cleaned. Here's some theme music for you; open it in another tab and put on repeat while you read.

This is the inside of one of the cabinets near the sink; pretty sure it's supposed to be white in there.

Notice the grease blobs under the ledge. I still haven't cleaned those off, but the indeterminate orange goobers on the bathroom ceiling are gone thanks to Mom going to town with a bottle of Clorox bathroom spray.

I'm pretty sure that this door was home made and screened by the guy who lived here before. I am all for DIY and upcycling and all that jazz, but this door sucks. And the screen is ripped, presumably because the door opens toward the wall of the garage thereby blocking access to the door opener and light switch. It is obviously easier to cut a tear in the screen than to open the door, close it, and THEN hit the switch of your choice.

That floor is GROSS.

Pop quiz: what part of the floor is clean in the bottom picture?

What the hell is that? A mangled purse dog? Someone's sad attempt at a felted bag? The remains of Jimmy Hoffa?

This is probably my favorite out of the bunch. A friend of mine was awesome enough to help me clean for a couple hours, and this is what she pulled out of the lint trap. We simultaneously yelled "OH MY GOD," then cracked up because several years of accumulated dryer lint is outrageous. And a huge fire hazard. I can only imagine that the duder who lived here before had no clue that you needed to clean the lint trap between loads. It must have taken him four or five times to get one load of clothes dry! Crazy.

I have all of the main things done (the last thing I had to do was to scrub the kitchen floor with 409 Degreasing Spray, which is magical) and all of my things put away. I'll take some pictures of the finished product sometime tomorrow and slap them up here, but for right now, I'm beat. Time to stop stealing the wireless signal from my neighbors and go to bed.